Where is the love?
by Lgbabyblu
Summary: After Marie died, everything seemed to be out of place in the Cartwright home. Suddenly, the people who were supposed to be the most important seemed to be forgotten, and its tearing everyone apart.
1. Chapter 1

  
  
Hi! This is my first Bonanza fanfiction ever!!!! I wasn't sure if I should continue this or not, but if you like it, give me a review and I'll continue with the writing!

-Lgbabyblu

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"Papa! Adam! You're home!" Little Joe Cartwright yelled, running out the front door to meet his pa.

Ben Cartwright smiled as he saw his energetic, 4 yr old run out of the house as he was just getting down from his horse Black. Before he could even put both his feet onto the ground, he felt something leap onto his left leg, while his right leg was still in the stirrup.

"Whoa cowboy! Let me get down first." Ben laughed, seeing his youngest son move back a little bit, but still bouncing slightly in anticipation.

"How was your day baby brother?" Adam asked, come up from behind and lifting his brother up into his arms.

"Adam!" Joe said with a laugh, throwing his arms around his older brother's neck.

Adam was 16 yrs old with dark, brown hair. He usually stayed home to watch his younger brothers, but lately his father had decided to yield to some of Adam's constant pleading and let him follow him to work off of the ranch.

"Little Joe! Come back here and eat your lunch before I whoop your behind!" Hoss yelled, waving a wooden spoon in the air.

Hop Sing had gone to visit his family in Virginia City for a few days, and Hoss had the responsibility to watch his younger brother for the a few hours. Although Hoss was only 10 years old, he was only a head shorted than his older brother Adam.

Ben didn't tell Hoss, but he had one of his trusted hands keep an eye out for them. He just wanted Hoss to feel like he had a role to play at home, because he knew his heavyset son wanted to help, but was still too young.

"I don't want any!" Joe protested with a firm look on his face.

"Adam, can you put the horses away." Ben asked, seeing his oldest son nod. "And you," He said, picking up Little Joe from Adam's arms, "Are going with me back into the house to finish your lunch."

"Awwww... Papa..." Joe groaned pouting with his bottom lip stuck out. "Can **WE** go to put the horses away? Please? I promise I'll eat."

"Well..." Ben said, looking at his son's emerald, green eyes that looked so much like Marie's.

He had never been able to say no to Marie and because of that, he's never been able to say no to Joseph who strikingly resembled her.

Lately he hadn't had a lot of time to spend with his younger son, and he felt really guilty about it. It was slowly killing him to hear his son beg to for his daddy and older brother to bring him along, but it was too dangerous for a young, energetic child to come along while they do ranch work. They all knew that between all the working and watching, Joseph could get injured or even killed.

With Marie gone, he knew how lonesome the 4 year old got, and decided just for once, he'd postpone lunch for a few minutes due to a young boy in dire need of his father.

"Well... all right." Ben said, seeing the glow on Joe's face after he agreed to his request.

Ben lifted his son and put him on Black's back. He turned his back to Joseph to give a grin to Adam and Hoss.

"You two go wash up and start on lunch. We'll be back in a few minutes." He said as he saw Adam's face turn from a grin to a frightened look.

"Joe! No!" Adam yelled out, running towards the horse.

He saw his brother take the reins of the horse and move them in all different directions, confusing the horse. At first, the horse only looked a little agitated, moving a little ways to the left and a little to the right, but then Adam saw the first leaping movements, showing that the horse was getting angry.

Ben had a confused look on his face. He turned around just in time to hear a terrifying scream of fright and his horse bucking, and throwing his front legs into the air. Everything seemed like slow motion. Ben froze as he saw his youngest son start falling from the horse and calling for him, making him have flashbacks of the death of his third wife Marie who died of an unfortunate riding accident.

Although his father was frozen in horror, Adam quickly went into action. As Joe was thrown off the horse, he was too late to break his fall but he was quick enough to reach the horse as its hooves hovered just a few feet above his baby brother's head.

"Whoa!" Adam yelled out, running to scoop up his brother just as the hooves came down to the ground.

Ben came out of his frozen state and grabbed onto Black's reins, pulling him down. When he got his horse to calm down, he turned his attention to his frightened sons, seeing all of their ashen faces. Guilt washed over him through and through. With his head bowed down, he took Black and Adam's horse Sport towards their stalls.

Adam held onto his baby brother as Joe cried on his shoulder, nestling his head in the crook of Adam's neck. Joe clutched onto Adam's neck for dear life and Adam was starting to run out of air. By then, they were a safe distance away from the horse, and his father was leading the horses away.

Adam looked at his father, seeing the proud man now with his shoulder slumped. It didn't look like the man he'd known for the 16 yrs of his life.

"Adam, is Joe all right?" Hoss asked, tugging on Adam's sleeve.

"I don't know. Let's bring him inside and see." Adam said, taking charge since his father didn't seem to be in the mind set to be helping Joe of any bit.

Adam rubbed Joe's back, hoping it would comfort his younger brother as he brought him to the settee with Hoss right behind his trail. Now that he was seated a bit, he got a closer look at Joe. Nothing seemed to be out of place, other than a few scratches and faint bumps that would soon be bruises. He brushed his hand back through Joe's hair.

"You all right Joe?" Adam asked in a gentle, yet concerned voice.

He pulled Joe off him a little bit to get a better examination of his younger brother.

"There's nothing broken is there?"

Joe's response was to lean in and hug Adam harder.

"Okay, okay. Everything's going to be all right." Adam said, wrapping his right arm around the back of Joe's head and left on his back.

"Yeah short shanks. Adam's gonna take real good care of you." Hoss said, sitting on the settee next to his two brothers. "I'm gonna take good care of you too."

Hoss stared at his younger brother, not hearing a word come out of him. He looked at Joe and then back at Adam.

"You think we should get Dr. Martin here? He's really quiet." Hoss said with concern.

"Well you can't ride alone. Either Pa or I will have to go get him." Adam said, stroking his Joe's hair.

The thing was... he didn't know what happened to his pa. His father would never leave one of them if they were hurt, especially the youngest of all of them. It confused him more that his pa didn't come in with them to check on Joe.

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Please review with any constructive comments, because those comments will be the deciding factor in the continuation of this story!!!! And no... if you think I'm an adult, I'm not!!! Teens can like oldie shows too!  



	2. Chapter 2

WOW!!! Thanks for all the reviews! I didn't think this story was any good. Hope you enjoy this chapter, and .... well I'm just awed.

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Ben finished putting Sport into its stall and started on Black.

He knew he should go in to comfort his youngest son, but guilt poured over him like a piece of carpet to a storm. It soaked him, weighed him down, and kept him from going inside. He had blamed himself for the death of Joseph's mother and now the accident.

"Pa."

Ben turned around seeing his second son Eric come into the barn.

"Adam wants you to get Dr. Martin." Hoss said, his eyes getting teary. "It's awful Pa!" He cried, running into Ben's arms. "He's awfully quiet, and that's hardly like Joe."

Ben felt a little out of it, but he soon got his head back together. He had to take care of his sons. That was his responsibility.

"Everything is going to be okay son." Ben said, hugging Erik tight before letting him go.

Without a moment of hesitation, he re-saddled a new horse and road off to Virginia City to get Paul.

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"Ben, I am sure he is fine. Other than some aches and bruises, he'll be up on his feet in no time." Paul said as Ben led him to his horse cart.

"I'm just worried about him."

"I know you are Ben." Paul said with reassurance. "You know it wasn't your fault."

"I know, but maybe if I had watched the horse a little longer..."

"I meant Marie." Paul said, stepping up to get onto his cart.

Ben's eye's glossed over. He stared intently at the dirt floor, drilling holes into the ground.

"Well I'll see you next time Ben. If you need to talk, you know where to find me." Paul said, before clucking for his horse to move forward.

Ben didn't know how long he stood outside, but eventually he pulled himself together and he trudged back to the house he built. When he reached the door, the first thing he heard was his first son's strong yet tender voice.

"—and the knight held his sword about to strike the black knight. The strong, white knight lifted his sword just as the black knight rode his horse toward him. Ducking from sword that slashed towards his head, the white knight threw his sword towards the black knights back and finally, there was peace to the kingdom as the black beings vanished." Adam read from his book.

"Wow Adam. That was a great story!" Hoss exclaimed, bouncing on the settee.

Adam was sitting slanted in between the arm and back of the long couch. His youngest brother Joe was lying on his chest, quietly listening to his stories.

He actually fibbed on a few parts of the story because the book he was reading was a little too gory for children.

Adam started to shift a little on his seat.

"Well I think its starting to get late Hoss. Little Joe looks all tuckered out." He said, picking Joseph up into his arms.

"No I'm not Adam." Joe complained softly, but laid his head on the crook of Adam's neck as they climbed up the stairs.

Although he was well aware that the horse accident was just an accident and he was just fine, Little Joe still felt scared stiff. He wouldn't set foot 2 feet away from Adam, but Adam didn't mind because he wasn't planning on letting his younger brother go. Adam felt like he had an obligation to watch his younger brothers now that their father was going through the effects of being a widow.

Adam climbed the stairs, followed by Hoss right behind his heels.

"Adam, is Pa going to tuck us into bed?" Hoss asked, reaching the top within two more steps.

"Maybe. Just hurry it up and get into bed." Adam said, giving his younger brother's behind a pat to move forward. "I'll come tuck you in after I put Joe into bed all right?"

"Okay Adam." Hoss said cheerfully, reaching his door with a burst of energy.

Before he went in, he turned his head to his brothers.

"Good night short shanks." Hoss said, watching as Joe gave him a small, tired wave good night.

Adam opened the door to Joe's room, and walked towards the bed. He pulled the tired 4 year old away from him, and put him into bed.

"You want me to stay here until you fall asleep?" Adam asked, sitting on the bed when he saw Little Joe nod his head.

He reached to the end of the bed and pulled the covers under his younger brother's chin.

"When's Papa coming in?" Joe asked tired, rubbing his eyes while giving out a loud yawn.

"Soon. Just close your eyes and sleep all right?" Adam said, brushing Joe's hair softly.

Soon he could hear Joe's soft breathing, and he got up of the bed slowly so he wouldn't wake up his younger brother.

He tip toed out of the room and shut the door enough so only a few streaks of light could come through the opening, but he could hear Joe if he needed him. Adam walked down the hallway and went into his second youngest brother's room. He opened the door and smiled, seeing Hoss already sound asleep in bed. He walked quietly to Hoss's bed, draping the blanket that had fallen to the floor over his brother's body, and tucking him in. Before he left, he kissed Hoss on the forehead and whispered good night to his younger brother.

After a long day, Adam went to his own room and stretched out his tired muscles from carrying Little Joe all day. He went to his wash his hands and splash some water on his, but then realized Hop Sing was still in town, and there wasn't anyone to put warm, clean water in his room. Sighing, he changed into his night clothes and climbed into his bed, falling asleep instantly when his head hit the pillow.

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Some time during the night

Little Joe woke up with a start, having woke up from dreaming that he fell of from Black and he kept falling and falling. He looked around the room and saw looming black shadows everywhere, intensifying his fear of the dark. His eyes started to get watery as warm tears slid down his face.

Quickly getting out of bed, Joseph quickly pulled his door open and ran into Adam's room. He saw Adam sound asleep in bed. Tip toeing in, Joe sat next to Adam's bed, and then laid down on the rug beside Adam's bed, content to know that he was near his older brother who he considered his hero.

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Sorry for the long wait, but I was too busy to write the rest of the chapter. I know... the chapter was short, but I just had to finish the chapter before I continued with my homework. I don't really like how the story ended, but I couldn't think of anything to write, so hope you enjoyed the chapter!

Please give constructive criticism. I don't care if you review that my story sucks, all long as you tell me why, I can start of from there and improve!

-Lgbabyblu


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